Nineteenth Sunday of the Year
Homily
Two couples stood before this altar yesterday afternoon and promised to be faithful to one another until death and to accept children lovingly from God and to bring them up according to the teaching of Christ and his Church.
Many in this world think they’re crazy.
- Where did they get all this from? they ask: That marriage is supposed to last a lifetime? Well, at least when they come to their senses there's an app for that. All you have to do is download it to your iphone or ipad, punch in your financial information and divorce apps.com will estimate how much it will cost to abandon your latest spouse.
- Where did they get all this from? they ask: That marriage requires lifelong fidelity? But what about all those nightly stories about the divorces of Sandra Bullock or Ivana Trump or Larry King? And what’s with those adds on Craigslist?
- Where did they get all this from? they ask: That marriage entails a commitment to having and caring for children? Why do you suppose that the Federal Government provides a substantial tax break for married people? Is it because marriages used to produce the next generation of children who will become citizens and so the state felt it had an interest in fostering their well being? But now we have sperm banks, and professional couples with no time for children, and we're able to make lifestyle choices which opt for a second car over a second child. Children and marriage you say? How quaint!
- Where did they get all this from? they ask: That marriage is between a man and a woman? Whose business is it anyway who I marry? Marriage is a choice and I get to choose who I marry and what it means and no one but a bigot can tell me otherwise. Just as we get to define the signage on South Main and the Racino in Ranham, the state has a right to define the meaning of marriage.
- Where does the Church get these ideas from, the world asks? She gets them from God. For it is the will of God as revealed through his Church down through the centuries that 'marriage is a faithful, exclusive, and lifelong union between one man and one woman, joined as husband and wife in an intimate partnership of life and love, a union established by God with its own proper laws. That marriage exists equally and inseparably for the mutual love and support of the spouses and for the procreation and education of children. Such a vision of marriage makes the human person whole and contributes to the dignity, stability, peace, and prosperity of the family and of society.'
And other definitions, by someone other than God, just aren't the same.
The California Ruling
This past week, a district court in California overturned the ban on same sex marriage in that state. The airwaves and the internet are replete with commentary, much of it generating more heat than light. But the Church remains committed to the light and the truth. And the truth is that marriage is not something open to anyone's redefinition, not even the Church's. Ours is a revealed religion, and we believe that God has ordained that marriage is for a man and a woman for life in fidelity, lived in co creation with God of life and of love.
Gay Marriage
So what of two gay people who want to be married? What does the Church have to say to them?
Many people are gay, indeed, probably many of those sitting before me right now have probably felt strong impulses of same sex attraction. The Church does not teach that you are bad, or defective, or broken, or sick. The Church teaches that all men and women are created in the image and likeness of God
At the same time, the Church teaches that the purpose of sex is love and procreation and that any and all all sexual activity outside the bond of marriage is sinful. Masturbation is sinful; and sex with someone to whom I am not married, of the same or the opposite sex, is sinful.
Celibacy
So what is a gay person to do? To live a life devoid of love? Never!...for the purpose of life, the reason for which each one of us were made, is to learn to love and serve God and my neighbor, and thus be happy with God forever in heaven.
Christ calls the gay Christian to love. He calls him or her to a heroic love, a sacrificial love, which draws them all the closer to his cross, to participate in his perfect sacrifice,...for the gay Christian is called to a lifelong faithful celibacy, shish to this world seems absurd, but to the one who accepts the cross is an incredible grace.
Celibacy? The world snickers and scoffs: it's not possible. But it's the same people who snicker at faithful celibacy who snicker at faithful married love. Ask the five priests who live across the street or the religious who teach in our schools, and care for our elderly, and feed the poor. Is celibacy possible? Ask me.
As a priest, I have been called to lifelong celibacy, and I am convinced that such is the will of God for me. And it is because of this celibacy that I have lived a life filled with love, given and received, far beyond my wildest imaginings. And to the degree that I have committed myself myself to a life of true chastity and authentic celibacy, to that extent have I been overwhelmed with the love of God showered upon me in my unworthiness through friends and family and fellow travelers in God's holy Church.
Will I ever know the joy of holding my own child in my arms or of hearing the voice of a wife who has pledged faithful love to me unto death? No, but real love, whether married or celibate, entails sacrifice, for sacrifice leads us to the cross, which is the only place where love is really learned.
A Final Word
So to all who are gay, I tell you this morning. God loves you, your Church loves you, and you are invited to a great adventure of lifelong celibate love.
And to you who are not gay, married or single, you too, each in the unique life experiences God has given you, in good times and in bad, are invited to love in the image of God.
For in the end, it is not a question of labeling people straight or queer, of condemning people to a hidden life of shame, or of casting anathemas over walls of hate, built of our own fears.
Rather, let us love one another in kindness and truth, as a great Bishop's motto and life once reminded us, and let us never fear to love as Christ has called us to, faithfully, for the rest of our lives.
Monsignor James P. Moroney
Rector
